Tuesday 16 November 2010

Five things That Annoy Me About British People*

*This one requires a disclaimer.  I am going against my own advance and will be making sweeping generalizations in this post.  Please do not bother to comment about how the British person(s) you know does not do A, B, C or D.

1. British Newsreaders Pronounce Barack (as in Obama) Bear-ick.  What is this about!?  Its a man's name, you cannot decide on your own pronunciation for it or blame it on dialect or accent.  There is only one correct pronunciation and it is Bah-rock.  C'mon BBC - get it right.

2. "Cutesy" nicknames and shortening of words.  I think its mostly British women who are guilty of this one as luckily, I have never heard my husband or any of his male friends do it, but I seem to hear women say do this all the time.  Examples include:  "piccy" (picture or photo), "footie" (football), "pressie" (present) and "brekkie" (breakfast).  And these are grown people saying these words to other grown people.  

3. The relationship with the average British person and sunshine.  Refer to my post on 4 October for a full discussion on this topic.

4. I hate (and yes, I know its a strong word) when British people return from vacation/holiday in Florida or California (since those seem to be vacation destinations of choice) and think they are an expert on American culture.  They come back spouting nonsense about things that Americans do and what its like in America not realizing there is an entire country in the middle of the two coasts that are NOTHING like the vacation superspots they may have visited.  Sorry, folks, but you have not seen America if you have just spent a week in Disneyworld. 

5. The British obsession with tea.  I'm not annoyed that most British people like tea, I'm annoyed that the British people I work with (and I am sure they aren't the only ones) drink tea all day long. I dont like the smell of tea, I don't like the arguments over who boiled the kettle last, I dont like the way that using the last of the water in the kettle without filling it up again is a crime punishable by death and I dont like the "milk police" who demand explanations from their office mates if they dare to use the skim milk and unbalance the carefully calculated milkman order.
Tea creates hostility, although you can you see from the photo on the right, some people disagree...

19 comments:

  1. Ha! I love number 2 - because y'all never do that... hahahaha!

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  2. I think you mentioned the Barack thing on FB and ever since then it's been driving me nuts.

    As for shortening of words, I couldn't stand how they would shorten people's names or give them nicknames. I went to a party once and met, Rodge, Si, Cat, Becks, and Shev. Then of course I worked with Bazz (Barry) and Shazz (Sharon). I was really glad my name couldn't be shortened!

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  3. haha! I hope you weren't one of the masterminds behind the Great Milk Theft!

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  4. I find this really interesting! I have my own list in my head that I'll have to post one day

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  5. 2. I thought it was just me hating that!

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  6. You are very funny! And you have to send me that mug in your photo. I'll pay for it. I am one of the Americans that has become obsessed with tea once my husband and I decided to quit spending over $500 dollars a year on coffee, and another $210 dollars a year for that not good for you....French Vanilla..highly processed coffee creamer that we put our coffee in. After my last pregnancy, we went straight to tea all day. I used to do tea only in the afternoons. Of course, we are southern, too so we like iced tea.

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  7. The nickname Chezza for Cheryl Cole annoys me to no end!

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  8. okay, I'm british, yes your blog is funny but let me put something straight
    1. Most people do say Barack Obama's name correctly, just because the BBC doesn't it doesn't necessarily mean that we all do.
    2. we doesn't shorten every name we come across, but sometimes it's ridiculous, for example kimberley to kim, OK but Cheryl to Chezza, WTF! but thats mainly newspapers. i'm a girl an di certainly don't use prezzie or brekkie
    3. yes we love sunshine, have you seen our weather? its horrible of course we have a obbession with sunshine!
    4. I've been to New York and no I did not comeback as an expert on America, all i back knowing was the NY is bloody freezing in December
    5. WE ALL LIKE TEA! don't make me laugh, my college has an area so we can make hot drink yes what no tea just coffee. Personally i quite like tea, i'm not a hufe coffee fan and some of my friends and my parents hate tea ... but i'm not going to lie there are some tea freak in the uk

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  9. Oh Anonymous - please read the disclaimer again.

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  10. fuck off britain is amazing you are all just jealous

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  11. Since you said you were in college, please allow me to give you a pointer that might help make your next heckle a bit more effective - it's called basic grammar. You have actually just told Britain to fuck off, not me, so your kind comment should actually read "Fuck off. Britain is amazing; you are all just jealous." But then just to be pedantic - I'm the only one you're talking to, so "you are just jealous" would be more appropriate. Thank you for reading my shitty blog.

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  12. I think the tea addiction is all down to the freezing weather. I get by on hot milk, and so far, it's worked.

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  13. This seems to be done in a particularly mean spirited way. Did not like.
    I honestly have no idea what the Barack thing is. We do tend to skip vowels when talking quickly. Everyone I know pronounces is Ba - rack (like a norther would say bath, and 'rack', like a towel rack)
    2. I've never done it, but I'm sure it would irritate me too. People who actually like football tend to look at people who say footie with disdain. I mean hey, you guys say 'bucks'.
    3. It may rain 1/3 of the time, but britain is overcast at least 80% of the time, look into it.
    4. Makes sense. America is pretty vast. What irritates me is Americans who have no idea what Britain is like talking about it. Not you since you live here. But since there isn't much British media in America they all seem to think we sound Australian in my experience, plus so many Americans seem to think London = Britain.
    5.Tea is a staple part of many peoples lives, we enjoy, it chills us out, it can be a very social experience or a very private one. Offering someone a cup of tea is how British people accept others into the fold as it were. We assume that everyone likes tea just a little bit, though you may take it a certain way.
    Just a little reminder though that it really wouldn't be hard for a British person just to crap all over American culture as you have here.

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    Replies
    1. Crap away! I'll even re-post it if it's any good.

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  14. Wow, zenophobe? So we don't so Bear-ick.. we say Ba-Rack. as that's his name.

    So wanna explain to me EYE-RACK, MUZZ-LIMS etc.

    Hilarious how you created a whole blog just for bashing the British people.

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    1. Hey July 15 Anonymous: wanna explain to be zenophobe? The word is xenophobe.

      Hilarious how you and Jay-Jay read one post and think I hate all things British.

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  15. Here's my question to you, If you hate the British so much how about you fuck off elsewhere. Plenty of other countries for you to go and whinge in, sounds like you love America so why not head back there, as I'm assuming that's where you're from. Nobody is making you stay here.

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    1. Oh Jay-Jay, darling, please work on your grammar the next time you heckle me. Your vitriol will come across so much better if you structure your sentences correctly.

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  16. Righto then Guvnor....................

    Yes I'm British............and I happen to agree with most of what you've just said!

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